An Open Letter to my Son on his birthday

Dear Bubba,

You are two years old today, and I already love you more than I ever knew possible. Everyone tells you the love for a child is great, but there are NO words to describe the love a mother has for her child. I wish it was possible to bottle it up and give it away, because it's a love that is powerful enough to end wars, heal hearts, and mend bridges.

The day I found out I was pregnant with you was a shock! Don't get me wrong! I wanted you, and had prayed for you, but Daddy and I had only been married for 2 weeks when we got the big news. We were scared and excited and we weren't sure we were ready for this new adventure. But we knew you would be worth it, so we started to get ready.

The day you decided to arrive was even more of a surprise. You must have been tired of waiting to meet us, because you made your arrival into this great world 5 weeks and 1 day early! But Daddy and I weren't scared for one minute. Labor was hard, but you were worth every second of it. And even though you decided to come early, Mama got to have the exact birth she had hoped for. I had a feeling we would get along just fine after that!

You arrived small but MIGHTY!! You were happy and ready to great the world with great big lungs! I didn't grasp then what was about to happen to our lives. You were full of life already and we had only begun our journey together.

As we got to know each other, we had some really hard day. Days were we weren't on the same page, couldn't get it all together, or had too many tears. But we had good days too. Days with first smiles, and giggles, and finally sleeping through the night. We balance our good days with the rough ones. I now know this is part of being a mama. No one has good days all the time and no one is perfect. Not even Mamas!

I love watching you learn new things. Seeing how your mind work and watching the wheels turn. I love watching you grow strong and confident. Seeing how your conquer past fears or falls and take on each challenge with relative patience for a little man. I love watching you sleep. This might be one of my favorites. Seeing your sweet angel face appears when you are still (which rarely happens theses day) and knowing this is part of who you are too! I love how you love your sister. Seeing the special bond between you both make Daddy and I know we are doing it right most days. I love the innocence and wonder in which you see the world. The joy and excitement in which you experience the world. You have made me a better person, Bubba....and the best mama ever.

Today, you turn TWO! Your world wide with possibility and opportunity. Nothing is off the table for you. You never take NO for an answer, and while that makes me crazy now, I hope it never deters you from what you want as you grow up. You are silly and wild and fearless. But you still have a soft and tender side when we need it. You are confident in what you do...learning as you go, like your mama! I wish this wild and silly way in which you see the world lasts as long as possible. I know it won't be like that forever, but I hope the childlike ways in which you embrace the world lie close to your heart forever.

As we embark on another year, I think about the joy and love you have given us already. What you gave to your Great Mama and how you were the light of her world. How you gave her the reason to hang on to this life a little longer. It's the greatest gift ever given, little man. And you did that. I think about what you will give our family this year and the years to come. I look forward to seeing it, and it's my greatest privilege in life to teach and to love you.

You will always be my little man. And I will always be your mama. I will love you through and through, forever and always.

Happy birthday Bubba! Thank you for making me a MAMA!

To the moon and back!

Mama C

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